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  • Tom Goldstein

Master the Art of Success: Advanced Communication Skills Uncovered


People communicating well

I recently collaborated with fellow coach and friend, Christelle Garcia, to deliver a highly successful and interactive one-day workshop in collaboration with a high performing sales team at a leading telecoms solution business. We focused on enhancing the team members’ communication soft skills, to support their initiative to increase the sales value of their opportunities. This article explores the main themes from that workshop.


Effective communication is the cornerstone of success in leadership, sales, and any professional or personal environment where other people are involved. Mastering advanced techniques and styles can set you apart from the competition.

By honing effective communication skills, you can navigate personal and professional situations with greater ease and confidence, enabling them to establish healthy relationships, work efficiently in teams, resolve misunderstandings, make informed decisions, persuade others, gather valuable information, present information clearly, understand and manage emotions, succeed in your career, and interact respectfully with people from diverse backgrounds.


Advanced communication skills are particularly crucial in leadership, complex collaborations, and high-value sales due to the complex nature of these environments, which often involve significant investments, high stakes, and long-term commitments. These advanced skills help leaders and sales professionals build trust and rapport with, allowing them to tailor their approach accordingly.


The first skills we addressed in the workshop are the bread and butter of communication: Active Listening and Targeted Questioning. These are the most vital skills in communication and sales conversations, as they help build rapport, trust, and credibility while allowing professionals to understand customer needs, tailor solutions, address objections, and guide decision-making. These skills enhance adaptability and contribute to more effective communication, ultimately increasing the likelihood of successful outcomes from conversations.




Being able to track and manage our own nervous system is important for effective communication because our physiological state directly impacts our ability to think clearly, articulate our thoughts, and perceive and respond to others. The aim is to stay well within our window of tolerance so that we are not trying to communicated when we are triggered, defensive or otherwise not in an optimal physiological state.


To track and regulate your nervous system, develop self-awareness and practice mindfulness to recognise stress and emotional cues. Use techniques such as deep breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, and grounding exercises to calm your nervous system.


Tracking and helping the other person regulate their nervous system during communication is a powerful skill for fostering empathy, promoting emotional regulation, enhancing active listening, improving nonverbal communication, supporting cognitive functioning, facilitating collaboration and problem-solving, and boosting stress resilience. This ultimately leads to more effective interactions and helps to avoid a situation where you are trying to communicate with someone who is being defensive or is entrenched in their position.


Tracking other people's nervous systems involves being observant and empathetic to recognize signs of stress, anxiety, or emotional shifts. Here are 5 tips for noticing cues in others:

  1. Nonverbal cues: Pay attention to body language, facial expressions, and gestures, as they can indicate someone's emotional state. Look for signs like fidgeting, clenched fists, crossed arms, rapid breathing, or tense facial expressions.

  2. Tone of voice: Listen to the person's tone of voice, which can reveal emotions such as stress, anxiety, or frustration. A shaky, raised, or tight voice might signal that their nervous system is dysregulated.

  3. Eye contact: Notice their eye contact during conversation. Avoidance of eye contact, excessive blinking, or rapid eye movements can be indicators of nervous system dysregulation.

  4. Conversation content and flow: Pay attention to the content and flow of the conversation. If the person is struggling to articulate their thoughts, appears distracted, or frequently interrupts, they may be experiencing nervous system dysregulation.

  5. Emotional cues: Be empathetic and sensitive to the person's emotions. If they seem upset, irritated, or overwhelmed, it’s likely a sign that their nervous system is dysregulated.

By being observant and empathetic, you can better understand and respond to other people's emotional state, leading to more effective communication and supportive interactions.


An additional skill is to be experienced with a simple but effective model /map of communication styles. Two examples that I like are the Social Styles Model or the Strength Deployment Inventory (SDI). These are helpful tools because they help you to understand and adapt to different communication preferences which builds trust and ease within interactions. These models also assist in conflict resolution by enabling people to address the core motivations and communication preferences of others, ultimately improving overall communication effectiveness.


Finally, good objection handling is a crucial communication skill as it helps overcome barriers and builds trust. Often objection handling also helps to demonstrate value and helps those involved to navigate complex conversations towards a useful outcome for all involved. To take objection handling to the next level, sales professionals can continuously refine their skills, adapting to unexpected situations and customer needs by leveraging advanced techniques.


In summary, effective communication is the foundation of success, especially in sales. Mastering advanced techniques and styles can give you a competitive edge. By understanding communication styles, such as the Social Styles Model or Strength Deployment Inventory, you'll be able to adapt to the preferences of your customers and enhance collaboration. Furthermore, by skilfully navigating divergence and convergence, practicing active listening and targeted questioning, and taking objection handling to the next level, you'll unlock new opportunities, foster better relationships, and ultimately drive greater sales success.

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