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Cloudy Mountain
Tom Goldstein

A Journey to Embrace and Cultivate More Joy in Life

People enjoying an evening view of the ocean

Introduction: What Joy Means to Me


When I think of joy, it isn’t about those big celebrations or rare achievements. For me, joy comes more quietly, and it’s often intertwined with nature. I’ve found it in the simple act of being outdoors, perhaps walking through a quiet park or hiking on a sunny day. These moments bring a sense of peace and connection, especially when shared with good friends.


In my work as a coach, I’ve seen how joy, or the absence of it, impacts people’s lives. While happiness can be tied to external events, joy is a more internal experience. It’s something that resides in how we engage with the world and ourselves. And it’s worth the effort to find and nurture.


Why is Joy Important?

Joy isn’t just a feel-good emotion; it’s a state that can change how we experience life. People who cultivate joy tend to be more resilient and have healthier relationships. When we experience joy, it affects not only how we think but also how we respond to challenges and how we connect with others.


Joy is also an anchor that can keep us grounded during tough times. It helps us focus on what matters most and find small moments of light when life feels heavy.


How to Assess the Level of Joy in Your Life

Understanding how much joy you already have doesn’t require a complex process. It’s about self-awareness and taking time to reflect. Here are some questions I find helpful:


  • When was the last time you felt a deep sense of contentment or peace?

  • Which activities or experiences consistently leave you feeling energised or uplifted?

  • How often do you find yourself smiling or feeling grateful without effort?


One practical tool you can try is a "Joy Inventory," which involves reflecting on the past week, month, or even year, and listing down activities or moments that brought you joy. Revisiting these moments and noticing patterns can be enlightening. This exercise taps into the concept of savouring, which is about appreciating experiences and thereby reinforcing positive emotions.


Finding Out What Brings You Joy

For me, discovering what brings joy has been a continual journey. There was a time when I found joy in exploring new places or spending hours in conversation with close friends. Nowadays, I find it in quieter activities, like a mindful walk through nature or having meaningful conversations.


To find out what sparks joy for you, think back to recent or distant memories that brought you joy. Did these moments involve connection with others, being creative, or achieving something meaningful? You can also reflect on things you once enjoyed but may have stopped doing. What prevented you from continuing, and is it something you could revive now?


Cultivating More Joy in Your Life

Joy isn’t just something that happens by chance. It can be actively cultivated. Here are some ways to invite more joy into your life:


  • Practise Gratitude Journaling: Keeping a daily gratitude journal can be a simple yet effective way to shift your attention towards joy. Write down three things you’re grateful for each day, including the small joys. Over time, this practice can change how you perceive your experiences and enhance your mood.


  • Mindfulness and Sensory Exploration: Taking moments to focus on your senses – like savouring the taste of your food or listening to a favourite piece of music – can help you appreciate the present. This can elevate your mood and reduce stress.


  • Acts of Kindness: Simple acts of kindness can create a ‘helper’s high’ by activating your brain’s reward system. This could be something as simple as a compliment or helping a friend in need. Over time, these small acts can foster a deeper sense of joy and connection.


  • Create a Joyful Memories Album: A collection of photos or notes that remind you of joyful times can be a powerful tool to lift your spirits when you’re feeling low. Spend time looking through it and let those memories reinforce the joy you’ve experienced.


Recognising Barriers to Joy

There are also barriers to joy, which I sometimes refer to as "joy stealers." These could be thoughts, activities, or even people that drain your energy or diminish your joy. A key step in protecting your joy is identifying these and making conscious efforts to minimise their impact. For example, if negative self-talk is a recurring barrier, focusing on self-compassion and reframing these thoughts could be helpful.


It’s not about eliminating challenges or avoiding discomfort. It’s more about making space for the things that truly uplift you and noticing when something consistently drains your joy.


Conclusion: Embracing Joy as an Ongoing Journey

Cultivating joy isn’t about constantly being happy or forcing a smile. It’s about paying attention to what matters and making small, intentional choices to include more of these things in your life. As we build joy through simple practices, it becomes a state of being rather than a fleeting feeling.


If you’re feeling inspired, take one small step today to invite more joy into your life. Whether it’s spending time with a friend, going for a walk in nature, or starting a gratitude journal, these small actions can help you create a life that feels richer and more fulfilling.


As Tim Cook put it, "Let your joy be in your journey – not in some distant goal." Cultivating joy is an ongoing practice of appreciating where you are and finding beauty in the everyday moments that make this life uniquely yours.


My name is Tom Goldstein, I’m an Empowerment Coach & Vision Quest Guide. I write and coach about the practical application of modern self development concepts and ancient wisdom so you can live the life you really want, free from self doubt.


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